Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

I laid restless in my bed, tossing and turning. It was a couple days after an exam in my Honors Multivariable and Vector Calculus class, and for the first time in my life, I had bombed an exam. I had always held myself to the highest academic standard and became frustrated in high school when I got lower than an A- on assignments or exams. However, I mostly coasted off talent before college and never thoroughly studied. I was punished for that lackadaisical approach immediately when I couldn’t immediately understand the material. Before that calculus exam, my pride prevented me from studying. I falsely believed that the material, matrix multiplication, would come to me naturally without needing extra review and comprehension time. 

On the day we were scheduled to receive our exams back, I was quivering with anxiety. I had forgotten a core concept while staring at an exam problem, and I tried my best to piece together all of my knowledge in hopes of stumbling upon the correct answer. The professor placed the exam packet face-down with a slight frown. I hesitantly flipped it over and saw a C- circled with an intimidating red pen. All the blood drained from my face. While I wasn’t on the verge of tears, it devastated my entire day. It was impossible to focus on the new material my professor was trying to teach with the C- glaring at me.

Thoughts of inadequacy began to trickle and then flooded my mind as I progressed throughout the day and eventually collapsed into bed. How could I have performed so poorly on an exam? Good students don’t make mistakes like this. Why was I taking that class if I couldn’t immediately understand the material?

I didn’t know what to do. One sleepless night later, out of desperation, I visited the professor during his office hours and dumped my feelings of inadequacy onto him. He was very patient with me as I explained everything. Once I finished, he told me that it's not an indicator of failure to ask the professor for help; all the best students in his class were regulars in his office. He asked me to make a habit out of stopping by his office, even if I only had a question on one homework problem.

I followed his advice, and I managed to pass the course with a C. I considered myself to be a fantastic student before, but I was humbled by material I couldn’t immediately comprehend. That will happen to everyone at some point in their college careers, including you, and it doesn’t make you any less of a student. Needing more study time and review doesn’t mean you don't belong at RIT because you’re not smart enough; it means you're willing to dedicate the time and effort it takes to learn the material. Reframing your perspective in this manner will support your mental health through difficult moments. You will be picking yourself up and validating your status as a worthy student instead of kicking yourself when you're already down.

The first step to overcoming imposter syndrome is knowing that you're not the only student who has those feelings. Other students have fallen and stumbled multiple times to reach the level of success they currently have. If they try telling you otherwise, they are lying. Don’t compare your lowest points to other people’s highlight reels. Once you have given yourself that self-hug, the next piece of information you need is that one bad exam, project, or even entire course is not going to unravel your college career. Yes, your GPA will no longer be perfect, but one bad course over the span of five years will mean your grades average out and still remain high.

Beyond that, you need to be kinder to yourself. Comparing yourself to others, regardless if that places you in a positive or negative light, is unproductive at best and harmful at worst. Find confidence in knowing that you’re doing exactly what’s expected of you; you’re learning new material, and you’re supposed to make mistakes. With these pieces of advice, overcoming feelings of inadequacy should no longer feel like an impossible task.